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Fair Play
Cover of Fair Play
Fair Play
A Game-Changing Solution for When You Have Too Much to Do (and More Life to Live) (Reese's Book Club)
Borrow Borrow
A REESE'S BOOK CLUB PICK 
"A hands-on, real talk guide for navigating the hot-button issues that so many families struggle with."—Reese Witherspoon
Tired, stressed, and in need of more help from your partner? Imagine running your household (and life!) in a new way...

It started with the Sh*t I Do List. Tired of being the "shefault" parent responsible for all aspects of her busy household, Eve Rodsky counted up all the unpaid, invisible work she was doing for her family — and then sent that list to her husband, asking for things to change. His response was... underwhelming. Rodsky realized that simply identifying the issue of unequal labor on the home front wasn't enough: She needed a solution to this universal problem. Her sanity, identity, career, and marriage depended on it.
The result is Fair Play: a time- and anxiety-saving system that offers couples a completely new way to divvy up chores and responsibilities. Rodsky interviewed more than five hundred men and women from all walks of life to figure out what the invisible work in a family actually entails and how to get it all done efficiently. With four easy-to-follow rules, 100 household tasks, and a series of conversation starters for you and your partner, Fair Play helps you prioritize what's important to your family and who should take the lead on every chore from laundry to homework to dinner.
"Winning" this game means rebalancing your home life, reigniting your relationship with your significant other, and reclaiming your Unicorn Space — as in, the time to develop the skills and passions that keep you interested and interesting. Stop drowning in to-dos and lose some of that invisible workload that's pulling you down. Are you ready to try Fair Play? Let's deal you in.
A REESE'S BOOK CLUB PICK 
"A hands-on, real talk guide for navigating the hot-button issues that so many families struggle with."—Reese Witherspoon
Tired, stressed, and in need of more help from your partner? Imagine running your household (and life!) in a new way...

It started with the Sh*t I Do List. Tired of being the "shefault" parent responsible for all aspects of her busy household, Eve Rodsky counted up all the unpaid, invisible work she was doing for her family — and then sent that list to her husband, asking for things to change. His response was... underwhelming. Rodsky realized that simply identifying the issue of unequal labor on the home front wasn't enough: She needed a solution to this universal problem. Her sanity, identity, career, and marriage depended on it.
The result is Fair Play: a time- and anxiety-saving system that offers couples a completely new way to divvy up chores and responsibilities. Rodsky interviewed more than five hundred men and women from all walks of life to figure out what the invisible work in a family actually entails and how to get it all done efficiently. With four easy-to-follow rules, 100 household tasks, and a series of conversation starters for you and your partner, Fair Play helps you prioritize what's important to your family and who should take the lead on every chore from laundry to homework to dinner.
"Winning" this game means rebalancing your home life, reigniting your relationship with your significant other, and reclaiming your Unicorn Space — as in, the time to develop the skills and passions that keep you interested and interesting. Stop drowning in to-dos and lose some of that invisible workload that's pulling you down. Are you ready to try Fair Play? Let's deal you in.
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Excerpts-
  • From the cover

    1.

     

    The Curse of the

    She-Fault Parent

     

    I was ready to fold.

     

    Consider:

    The Case of the Missing Blueberries

     

    > I'm surprised you didn't get blueberries.

     

    I stared at my husband's text and imagined him speaking these words in what I call his "porn voice"-breathless, like he gets when he's frustrated or overwhelmed.

     

    Instantly defensive, I thought: Um, why can't you get the blueberries?

     

    I'd taken the afternoon "off" in order to spend time with my oldest, who was sorely in need of some mommy reconnection time in the wake of the recent arrival of his new baby brother. After going over my long list of instructions for the sitter (twice), I hustled out the front door to pick Zach up from school-all while balancing the snacks I'd just packed, a bag forgotten by the prior day's playmate, a FedEx package to be dropped off, a brand-new already-too-small pair of children's

    shoes to be returned, and a client contract that needed a markup

    before tomorrow morning. I was just barely holding it together when my husband's "blueberry text" arrived, and the tears came so fast and furious I had to pull over to the side of the road.

     

    How had it happened that I'd gone from successfully managing an entire department at work to failing to manage a grocery list for my family? And what self-respecting woman cries over an item forgotten at the market? And, just as alarming: Would a container of off-season blueberries serve as the harbinger to the end of my marriage?

     

    I wiped away the mascara streaks beneath my eyes and thought: This is not how I envisioned my life-the fulfiller of my family's smoothie needs.

     

    Hold up. Rewind.

     

    How I Got Here

     

    My mom and dad divorced when I was three and she was

    pregnant with my brother. Mom opted to forgo alimony to avoid acrimony and raised my brother and me in a one-parent home while working full-time as a professor of social work in New York City. Not a high-paying job, but she made it work for our family. Or so I thought until the first eviction notice was slipped under our apartment door. Mom had taught classes all day, picked my brother and me up from school, took us to the dentist uptown, dropped us back at home with a sitter downtown, and then . . . went back to work. When I saw the envelope on the floor, I opened it, read the letter inside, and then waited up late for Mom to come home. When she finally walked through the door, I broke the news to her that we no longer would have a place to live. I was eight years old. Mom assured me that she'd simply forgotten to pay our rent, and she would mail a check first thing in the morning.

     

    She followed through on her promise and we didn't have to move, but from that moment on I understood how hard life was for my mom because she carried 100 percent of the burden at home. Throughout my formative years and on too many occasions to count, I remember looking at her at the end of another long, exhausting day-my overworked super mom who tried to do it all-and thinking: That will never be me. When I grow up, I will have a true partner in life. Though it wasn't modeled for me, I became determined to build and sustain a 50/50 partnership one day.

     

    I worked hard and got myself through college and then law school, when I met the man who would become my partner. My best friend had set us up. Zoe said about Seth: "He's Jewish and obsessed with hip hop." I instantly flashed back to when I'd surprised guests with a choreographed dance to Slick Rick's...

About the Author-
  • Eve Rodsky received her BA from the University of Michigan, and her JD from Harvard Law School. After working in foundation management at J.P. Morgan, she founded the Philanthropy Advisory Group to advise families and charitable foundations on best practices. In her work with hundreds of families over a decade, she realized that her expertise in family mediation, strategy, and organizational management could be applied to a problem closer to home—a system for couples seeking balance, efficiency, and peace in their home. Rodsky was raised by a single mom in New York City and now lives in Los Angeles with her husband and their three children. Fair Play is her first book.
Reviews-
  • AudioFile Magazine From the opening lines of this highly accessible audiobook, the tone of Eve Rodsky's narration is arresting in its authentic desire to help. Her appealing voice makes her sound comfortable, confident, and quietly determined. She conducted more than 500 hundred interviews with couples who live together before putting together this package of insights and guidance. As a writer, she's a natural teacher, balancing colorful interview summaries with advice that sounds intuitive and actionable. She's even created a list of 100 common tasks necessary to run a household. This and four process rules will give domestic couples a way to clarify who will do what around the house. T.W. © AudioFile 2019, Portland, Maine
  • Publisher's Weekly

    September 16, 2019
    Rodsky, founder of the Philanthropy Advisory Group, tackles in her impressive debut the unequal standards for housework for women who perform many “unpaid, invisible” tasks in the home. A text from Rodsky’s husband about blueberries forgotten during the weekly shopping trip prompted her to ask for more help from him and eventually to come up with a “fair play” system for women who work full time (like their partners), but are also responsible for the lion’s share of home and child management. Broken down into four tenets—all time is created equal, reclaim your right to be interesting, start where you are now, and establish your own standards—her system came together from her research of domestic inequality and interviews with over 500 couples. To facilitate fair divvying up of responsibilities, Rodsky also provides 100 Cards of Fair Play, which represent the most common tasks in the home ecosystem, as well as sample calenders and discussion questions to help couples implement her rules. Couples searching for ways to better manage their families and achieve a balance of domestic work will benefit from Rodsky’s actionable strategy.

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Fair Play
Fair Play
A Game-Changing Solution for When You Have Too Much to Do (and More Life to Live) (Reese's Book Club)
Eve Rodsky
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